Today and butterflies

Hello! Hope you are thriving today

I am thinking again. Pondering. I have been formulating this blog for a while, but I think I am ready to try and make some sense of it.

Fear. It's something I have been personally battling for a long time... not just the "OHMYGOSHNOMORESCARYMOVIES" kind of fear, but the little things. subtle stuff.

Not to get on a wheel-o-regret, but there are a lot of things that I could have done, said or savored, but didn't because of fear.

I know what God says about fear - basically in a nutshell, "Don't - you don't need to." That is pretty amazing... pretty comforting... except for when you are toe to toe with it.

I am learning, however llllllooooooooonnnnnnnggggggg the process, that I will win, and fear will not. It's just a matter of walking it out.

Of learning to say "No, I am not agreeing with this crap, I don't have to cuddle it, embrace it, and make it part of me." Of plowing through, even when I think I want to retreat. It can be pretty often for me. But on the bright side? It's gotten better than it was.

There are people to bless and love, opportunities to blossom, lessons to learn, and so much more- one moment at a time, I can overcome. By the grace of God - His love in a cross shaped heart, and my ever-unfolding story, I can move forward.

I can't do an awful lot about the stuff I have missed... but I can do something about what is in front of me- today- and choose to press through it.

ps... did I ever tell you about the butterfly? It has to endure a pretty tough process to go from a caterpillar to a butterfly. The process is what strengthens it, and if someone came along and tried to "help"- to try and bypass the process, the butterfly wouldn't have enough strength to fly. It would perish. Pushing through the cocoon makes it strong.

No wonder I love butterflies <3>

Under Construction

If you live in Bristol, or have visited my end of our fair city these last few-make that several months, you have to have noticed the massive construction project underway. My friends and I have started taking bets as to which road will be closed with no warning on what day. It sure has been a headache! No matter which way you turn, you will find a delay.

I cannot tell you how much of a trial it has been. Never mind that the streets are soooo torn up, it feels like I am navigating the back roads of Maine on most of them. Delays, huge aggravation, and ridiculous road conditions.

Isn't that just like life? More delays and problems than you can count, it seems? One long annoyance... and in my neighborhood, noisy, at that.. : D

Unless you can see the big picture, you can miss any good that come out of all this aggravation.

Let me digress for one moment.. Well, I will, anyway, because it's my blog, and I can't hear your silent pleas for mercy... : P

A month or so back, when I was really agitated one morning- I had followed a car that had surely lost it's gas pedal, it had to be wired by inertia... ugh.. anyway, at the pinnacle of frustration, I opened the window and hollered at the policeman directing traffic. "So, any idea when this mess might be finished?" He chuckled and responded, " Thanksgiving??? Christmas???"

I hulked away in stony silence.

As I pondered his answer, I began to think about the construction that the Lord does on our character. It can seem awfully inconvenient and painful, at times. I wonder at how it can be such a long and arduous project. Especially on HIS end.. : P

But as we are fashioned with love, we become more and more lovely in the process... I want to look like my Papa.

Have a great week!