Digging in

Hello again! 

It's been a year since I have really had anything to say. (well, at least here)

I have been in a holding pattern of sorts, which may or may not be a good thing.

Have you ever contended for something? Stood your ground, fought the good fight, kept your eyes on the prize and all that? All the while, you watch your phone, emails, and mailbox for answers? 

Digging your heels in, you hold your breath in anticipation, sure that the answer is just around the corner? 

As time resolutely cranks past, the answer is too glaringly evident. It's a "NO." Whether it's sonorous or a whisper, it's still the same. 

Disappointment sets in the cracks of your heart, as you struggle to make sense of it.

It is at that very moment that I have a choice to make. 

I can become bItter, or I can become bEtter.. 
One little letter, so many facets.  

God tells me over and over that I need to trust Him. Especially when things don't make sense. When the bills are in collections, and I lose my job. When the doctor comes in with a terminal diagnosis. When the car is totaled. When I am betrayed. When "he" breaks my heart. 

Trust in Someone I can't even see? 

If I choose to look at this problem as a drop in the bucket of eternity, it looses the paralyzing grip on my heart. 

I love the Psalms, they always speak to my heart. 

Ps. 37:23 says "the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way." 

Ps. 62:8 "trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us." 

and 

Isaiah 26:3 "You will keep in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in You." 

Be encouraged, for those that are His, there is GOOD to come out of it, somehow. it might not start there, but it will get there. 

"and we know that in all things God works for the good for those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose."  Romans 8:28 

Have a GREAT day, and keep on keepin' on! 

<>< 

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

Ok... lately, I have been revisiting my thoughts on trials, afflictions, and bumps (or moguls) in the road. 

As a child I had the idea that "if I can just make it through ----------------, everything will be sooo much better!" 

I would get through whatever problem or obstacle that I faced, just to find another looming over the horizon. 

I have spent most of my life waiting for that "golden field of easy" to appear and let me dive in! 

It's taken me way too long many years to figure out that that isn't going to happen... 

Instead, I have discovered something that, for me, is fascinating... 

There, in the MIDST of the roller coaster ride that life deals, are the opportunities to create my own "golden field."

There have been times of deep and plaguing doubt, gut wrenching pain, and betrayal that have rocked me to the core. Sometimes it's my own, and sometimes it's those I love that are going through the monsoon. 

They say that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over.... and over.. and over... and over... and over... and expecting different results. YES!

That being said, waiting for everything to be perfect or even easy isn't cutting it anymore. 

If I want to be happy and find contentment, I need to see the nuggets that are placed in my life and seize the joy in them :)

I am learning that the laughter of my loved ones, the surprising and unexpected blessings, and the wonder and love of God have been helping to sustain me through the tough times. 

So there won't be that field of easy....  *many are the afflictions of the righteous (I am righteous by His grace, not my doing) but the Lord rescues them from them all!!!* Psalm 34:19 

One day at a time, I have what I need to get through that day.  I am learning to be grateful for the small things and believe me, that attitude is contagious! 

So, yes... there IS a Light at the end of the tunnel            <><  

Photo credit for photo 2 - A beautiful Mess Inside - thank you!!! 

Hope for tomorrow

While I don't generally get "preachy" I wanted to give you a wee bit of encouragement. This seems like a pretty good place to start :) 

At a time when so many are grappling with depression and some really hard things, I am finding myself torn between two extremes. 

While I am excited about the promise that a new year brings, I am also feeling bittersweet. 

This was a hard year, both for Connecticut, and for me, personally. 

Our state saw extreme devastation with Hurricane Sandy wreaking havoc with countless communities. We had a crazed gunman snuff out precious little and not so little lives - most of them never had a chance to grow and thrive. 

Personally, I have watched cancer spread it's ugly dark canvass over many of my dearest and closest. 

As I have watched people in my region by and large  retreat into fear and suspicion, I am struck again and again by the Words of Jesus - "Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold." Matthew 24:12

It sure seems to be the way of things lately, doesn't it? If you are like me, you are wondering where in the world the love is lately... 

I have some good news for you... in fact, some really Good News...

Real Love hasn't gone anywhere! He's still here, in the hearts of His followers/children, looking to be unleashed on this lonely, fearful, suspicious, and hurting world. 

Wherever you see love overcoming evil, there He is. In the smile of a stranger, in the eyes of a humble bus driver, or the caring hands of a hospice nurse. Or, in the arms of a soup kitchen volunteer giving food to the hungry. In the voice of a tenderhearted preacher, or the overworked and very underpaid teacher. 

God says in Scripture that if you look for Him with all your heart, He will let you find Him... "If you look for Me wholeheartedly, you will find Me." Jeremiah 29:13

"For God loved the world so much that He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life" John 3:16. (yes, THAT'S what those signs at football games mean ;) 

He loves you way more than you can even imagine! 

With that thought, I wish for you a New Year that brings more joy and hope than you ever thought possible! God bless, make beautiful music,  and stay safe!  <><

**If you would like more information on how to have a relationship with Jesus, leave me a note and I will help you in your search! 

So you are still single, huh?

Oh my-lanta... 

Have you ever had one of those days where you desperately wished that you could bring a fake tree around with you to hide in or behind all day?!?!?

Sometimes people mean well, but say the most unhelpful things... you know them, the "WMC"s, or 'Well Meaning Christians'; if they are not Christian, you can call them WMS' or "Well Meaning Souls". (shake my head) 

With them, you need extra grace... generally a bottomless supply. 

I got a great video from a friend that hit the nail on the head. "Things People Say to Singles" ... all.the.time. and yes, they do. I can personally attest to that. In fact, I could have added half dozen more. 
http://www.godtube.com/watch/?v=FC1M1CNU

With another  tidal wave proportion of my friends "Tying the Knot" and taking the plunge, it seems that my circle of friends has gotten abysmally smaller. We that are left seem to cling together like drowning souls on a life raft. 

While I am vehemently vexed at the onslaught of platitudes assailing me, I can take comfort in ONE thing and ONE thing alone. 

Jesus is with me. He knows I am sometimes really really tired of taking this trip "alone". He knows how it is to ache for a hug or just someone to come home to. He gets it... He knows the desires of my heart. In fact, I might even go as far as to say, HE PUT a whole bunch of them there! 

Laughter has been a saving grace for me, and the love of my growing friends and family is refreshing! 

So, one day at a time, one moment at a time, I choose to let Him love me in the lonely times as much as I know He does all the other times. 

I try and let Him, day by day, shift my often all too selfish focus onto Him, and I find that He sends me sooo many signs that He loves me and is with me :)   


God bless you as you row closer to Home!