Honesty is the best policy.. unless you work there...

Unheard of... another post... three in a week... hold onto your shorts, this is a good one... 

(I have no idea where that little ditty on the left is from, but I love it!) Progress- not perfection, right? Thanks to Facebook- the land of perpetual plagiarism...

Which brings me to today's topic... 

Maintaining honesty (integrity) in today's world. 

It IS possible. Sometimes, it's even entertaining... 

A few nights ago, I had to mail out a few packages from a local office supply store that also does USPS/Fed-Ex, UPS, etc... 

As I entered, I realized I needed the mailer packages, so I sauntered off to get the two I needed. 

Approaching the area designated for "mailing," I saw that there were a plethora of people waiting to be served, and the two girls behind the counter were wrapped up in one particular (agonizingly demanding) customer. 

It was interminably hot in the store. As I steeled myself for a long wait; drenched, I thought of the Uber rides I could be providing. 

Needless to say, I forgot to pay for the shipping mailers in my hurry to leave. 

Three Uber rides later, I was back at said store to pay for my envelopes. After taking a screen shot of the two (different) envelopes' SKUs, I headed off to the clerk I had dealt with earlier.  

The clerk looked at me like I had three heads as I explained my visit's purpose.

She sent me off to another clerk to try and pay. After explaining my story repeatedly, he responded that he was shocked that I came back to pay for it. I told him that I answer to a Higher Authority that wouldn't appreciate me stealing. 

He then proceeded to charge me for two of the smaller envelopes, rather than the larger and smaller - hence, too little. Negating the receipt, I was still pondering the math as I left the store.  

As I was trying to get away  leaving, the Holy Spirit prompted me to go back and explain, yet again, that I owed them money... 

Wanting ever so much to actually leave the store, I strode back in again. 

Visions of the movie Ground Hog Day filled my mind and dazed expressions of disbelief greeted me with the next set of obstacles clerks, as I again explained that I needed to pay more. 

They ambled of to find the manager. He came back with them, and said, "Ma'am, while we really appreciate your honesty, let's just call this thing even. Have a nice night." 

I just find it so curious that it was so shocking that I would want to make things right. 

But yet and still, I maintain that I did the right thing. Lights in the darkness, right? ;) 


<><  

Fill 'er Up!

Gas prices have dropped by a minuscule hair breadth... and, of course,  I am profoundly thankful. I figure any expense that actually drops is moving in the right direction. 

So, of course, my thoughts travel. Now would be the time to RUN sit back and endure enjoy this week's diatribe. 

As I am thinking of full gas tanks, I reflect that there are other "fulls" too. 

As the holidays approach with the usual sneak and stealth, I am thinking of full stockings, full plates, and then consequently, full bellies.

You can fill up your mind, your heart, and be full of a lot of things... not all of them good - i.e. be full of pride, bitterness, anger, drugs, alcohol, etc...

It's so easy to fill up your day, your house, credit card balances, wardrobe, and your calendar. 

The problem with a lot of "fills" is that they leave you emptier that you started. It's like trying to drink nail polish remover. It looks like water, it pours, but it evaporates and won't satisfy. In fact, it will make you sick! 

When you drink to escape, eat to numb, run on empty, and shop til you drop, you aren't helping.That problem, that hunger, that lonely won't go away at the end of it. 

We live in a society that breathes microwave-instant-now! We want full, and we want it NOW!!!! 

Can I tell you what satisfies? Every time? No lie... 

It's not a what, but a Who... 

Check this out... 

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness (in effect, Jesus), for they will be filled. Mathew 5:6

They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit. Jeremiah 17:8 

Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust him. Your roots will grow down into God's love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. 
Ephesians 3:17, 18

So, let God open you up! Running over and spilling out to all those that are hurting right about now. 

Trust me, there's nothing like it <>< 

God bless!!! 

Single Minded

Here's mom and dad... also known as Flo and Joe, respectively. 

Aren't they adorable? They were married for 59 years. Then my dad changed his mailing address to Heaven...three years later mom went, too.

It's been a challenge learning how to live without them. To say adapt is woefully inadequate. 

Since their passing, things have changed in consecutive 360* circles. Repeatedly. 

As a young woman, I couldn't even imagine getting married. 

When Jesus throttled my world at thirty four, I slowly grew to think that getting married would be a really cool thing. 

Now, years later, I am learning to function as a single woman, for all intents and purposes, alone. Alone in a world designed for "twos." 

It can, at times, be incredibly lonely. 

The married couples usually tell me that I am better off single - "Married people are often as lonely as single people." "Marriage is overrated." "You're better off, you won't have to deal with divorce."

Wow...

How do I maintain sanity in all this? 

Firstly, I am incredibly thankful for a God that takes care of me, and sends people to make the journey a little easier... 

I keep my focus on the race that I am running... I am running to win...  "Don't you realize that in a race everybody runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win!" 1 Corinthians 9:24

and 

as far as heaven goes, Jesus said it really well: 

"When everything is ready, I will come and get you, so that you will ALWAYS be with me where I am." John 14:3 

I can't imagine a better place to be than in His arms, can you?

and

Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize that there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you  Lao Tzu 


and

"Yet true godliness with contentment is itself great wealth."  1 Timothy 6:6


So, let hope arise, and dare to trust the One that holds you in His Hands. 

The best is yet to come! 

God bless- 

Lori 

The Lost Art of (Meaningful) Conversation

Hey! Thanks for stopping by!!! Or more likely, stumbling in and scrambling for the mouse :P 

I have, of course, been thinking again. This pic was taken at a Pizza place in New Haven that SHOULD be famous. I cannot understand why it isn't. But that is another rabbit trail for another  diatribe story. 

If you look closely, you can see that we are all communicating. Just not with each other... actually, this pic was staged... by me... to prove a point.

That point being that good stimulating (audible) conversation is rapidly becoming a lost art form. 

I am old enough that I remember a time before cell phones... and no, I wasn't born during the first world war...

When I was a kid we played outside. We got dirty. We made tree forts, played with Barbies... roller skated with our neighbors... we actually knew our neighbors. We colored, jumped in giant leaf piles, and had no idea what a video game was, since that hadn't been invented. We waited all week for Saturdays and cartoons! 

"What's your point,"  you ask warily?
"Why the trip down memory lane?" (and half way to the Twilight Zone)

My point is this... 

That everything has a price... This glorious time of technology, social networking, and instant information costs us something... 

While we are busy documenting our lives on "Insta-It'sallaboutme.com", we are missing something... 

The elderly guy on the park bench that wants to hear a pleasant voice, not necessarily you texting... 

The woman with three screaming and overtired children in the grocery line who could use a smile or a kind word...

Maybe the waitress that comes to bring your sandwich and fries is so lonely that she can't see a reason to live anymore...

While it's true that technology can bring distant people "closer", it usually misses with regards to people in the same house, or room, or at the same table for that matter...

I am working on my boundaries with regards to how much I use my cell phone when I am with people. I even put it AWAY, especially at meals :) Even with growing dependence on electronic devices, I want to keep balance. Board games are a great way attempt your transition into "being WITH people." Slooooowly but surely, I am making progress...

Make that difference!!! Those around you will be glad you did, and you will too!!! 

God bless! 

Lori 

Cramming for Finals

I can't  believe the semester is almost over. It seems like yesterday I was stumbling through awkward introductions. 

Here I sit on a glorious Sunday afternoon. Inside. Here, at my friendly neighborhood Starbucks, I'm in good company. The tables are full, and you can hear tapping and sipping as we conquer agendas, bit by bit.

I have ONE class... One. It's the first class back from a 24 year hiatus. Comparatively, it's not anywhere near as mind-numbing bad as next semester will be- it was a tentative baby step in my quest to finish what I started oh so long ago. 

Many things have changed. The school, the subjects, the faces, and certainly my capacity to retain. Thanks menopause - appreciate it. 

One thing that hasn't changed is the driving need to cram. 

Whoever said that there is no prayer in schools certainly has never sat through a make or break test or exam. 

"Ok", you ask, "Where is the inevitable spiritual analogy?" 

Glad you asked!!! lol

We wait to get ourselves right with God. We wait until the last possible minute, thinking that it will be such a dreadful odious affair. 

What if I tell you that you are wrong! Once you acknowledge (notice that the word knowledge is in acknowledge- pretty cool, huh?) that you need help,  you find an ocean of grace and peace... pretty sweet!

Here's truth - yesterday is a cancelled check, and tomorrow is a promissory note - Carpe Diem!!! 

So, don't wait... Ask Him to reveal Himself to you so you don't miss out on what you can experience today!

God bless and happy cramming!!! <>< 




References to check out in Scripture: 

"For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life."  John 3:16 

"For everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved."
Romans 10:13 

"But if we confess our sins to Him, He is faithful and just to cleanse us from all wickedness."   1 John 1:9 

Hope for tomorrow

While I don't generally get "preachy" I wanted to give you a wee bit of encouragement. This seems like a pretty good place to start :) 

At a time when so many are grappling with depression and some really hard things, I am finding myself torn between two extremes. 

While I am excited about the promise that a new year brings, I am also feeling bittersweet. 

This was a hard year, both for Connecticut, and for me, personally. 

Our state saw extreme devastation with Hurricane Sandy wreaking havoc with countless communities. We had a crazed gunman snuff out precious little and not so little lives - most of them never had a chance to grow and thrive. 

Personally, I have watched cancer spread it's ugly dark canvass over many of my dearest and closest. 

As I have watched people in my region by and large  retreat into fear and suspicion, I am struck again and again by the Words of Jesus - "Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold." Matthew 24:12

It sure seems to be the way of things lately, doesn't it? If you are like me, you are wondering where in the world the love is lately... 

I have some good news for you... in fact, some really Good News...

Real Love hasn't gone anywhere! He's still here, in the hearts of His followers/children, looking to be unleashed on this lonely, fearful, suspicious, and hurting world. 

Wherever you see love overcoming evil, there He is. In the smile of a stranger, in the eyes of a humble bus driver, or the caring hands of a hospice nurse. Or, in the arms of a soup kitchen volunteer giving food to the hungry. In the voice of a tenderhearted preacher, or the overworked and very underpaid teacher. 

God says in Scripture that if you look for Him with all your heart, He will let you find Him... "If you look for Me wholeheartedly, you will find Me." Jeremiah 29:13

"For God loved the world so much that He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life" John 3:16. (yes, THAT'S what those signs at football games mean ;) 

He loves you way more than you can even imagine! 

With that thought, I wish for you a New Year that brings more joy and hope than you ever thought possible! God bless, make beautiful music,  and stay safe!  <><

**If you would like more information on how to have a relationship with Jesus, leave me a note and I will help you in your search! 

A Long Wait

Do you ever stand in line wondering what else you could be doing? OF COURSE you do! There are some lines that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy - namely the D.M.V... 

Every second is an interminable Chinese water torture moment, suspended in eternity. Other lines are long and arduous, but at least there are perks. In the grocery store, they often have samples, eating while you stand there can be a small consolation. There is also reading the beyond believable Rag-Mag headlines. 

There are also the occasional lines where you will gladly wait no matter how long you have to endure the standing. 

Here's a line I stood in this weekend- it was the Apple Harvest Festival in Southington, CT. They make a delightful gastric feast in the form of a fritter.  A heavenly warm rolled in cinnamon-sugar fluffy puff. With real apples. Decent sized chunks o fruit... :) 

But in all seriousness, when you are trapped in a line, use the time to sow some "seed."  Some eternal seed - look for opportunities to help someone in need.

The Bible says something pretty cool about the subject: 

"They share freely and give generously to those in need. Their good  deeds will be remembered forever. They will have influence and honor." Psalm 112:9

So, sow some good seed and watch for great return! Peas out!

GPS

Don't you just love GPS systems? No? Ok...when they work?!!

I use mine all the time, and admittedly, I have become more than a little reliant on them, when it comes to mapping.

Last weekend I went with the church band to NYC and saw this amazing group play - the Michael Gungor Band. Tighter than a rusted lugnut on a humid summer day.

Afterwards the three car caravan started back, bob and weave style, to Connecticut. The driver of the lead car was relying on a GPS system that he wasn't comfortable with. After a sultry and prolongued tour of Brookyln's narrowest roads, and by the immeasurable grace of God, we were finally back on course.

It's pretty easy to get off course. Trust me, I know! : D

One way to stay positioned is with God's Positiong System - aka, the Holy Spirit...

That system never fails - He keeps me on track. (despite some of my dubious rabbit trails, at times). Don't take my word for it, take His. :) The steps of a righteous (or "in right standing" person) are ordered by God - feel free to ask me about the right standing part... very cool... :D

So, with the right GPS? You may wander about a bit, but you don't stay LOST! :)

Have a great week!

Lori

Divided and United

Hey all!!! Do you remember me? It's been a while... that's a lot of silence for this quasi-blonde... :)

It's a steamy Monday night, and as per usual, I have something lurking up in this ever surprising mind of mine. Perhaps the steam has been a loosening agent... :P

Sooo.... it was a great weekend... I played Friday night with a bangin' group-o- musicians...in fact, I have come to be quite fond of them... it's getting so that we are getting used to each other musically.. it's that "magic" time, when you can start to anticipate what the other one(s) is/are going to do! You can really bounce off of each other! So much fun... (usually) lol... In fact... I got a hand cramp three times from playing like a F5 tornado! whew...it's been a while... :)

I played Saturday and Sunday both... and compared to Friday night? Totally different atmospheres, and such different vibes... one totally structured and the other totally not.

There are two sides to me, musically... One is the free spirit, just waiting for the next "free form" to let loose and explore! She loves musical adventure and "going for it"...

The other one is the dread perfectionist that thrives on the familiar... She is the one that likes to be ultra-uber-ridiculously prepared. SHE likes the control... but one the plus side.. she IS practiced, and that is a good thing! She's not a lot of fun, but she IS useful for keeping to the program...

and really?

Both sides are necessary for balance. I want to play skillfully... aaaaand be stretched... aaaand flow like a lava machine : )

That's a lot like my Father, actually.. He is free flowing - like the wind.. you can't SEE the wind, but you can see the EFFECTS of the wind!

and that other side? He likes order - predictably so.

So, I am thinking that maybe I am a lot like my Daddy :)

Have a great week!

Keep Digging!

Hey there! Thanks for stopping by. I can't stay long, though.. I have some digging to do. Yeah, it's spring, and that means gardens everywhere are being delved into with rigor and gusto. The fragrances and blooms are enthralling. While there is much to be said along those lines, I have something else in mind as far as "digging" goes.

I suppose I am thinking more along the lines of spelunking, or caving. Exploring the depths of something to determine the contents.

Imagine the anticipation of the team as they clear the mouth of the cave. Winding and ominous, the stalactites drip a cadence echoing onto wet floor of the cave. Deeper in the explorers venture, away from the fresh air and light.

While it's true that "mining" here in the US is generally far from dangerous, the thrill of finding some weighty treasure is a lure for many!

Coal mining is pretty regulated here in the US and a lot safer than it ever was. There are two types, surface and underground. Much of the best mining is underground. That requires some digging.

If you want to get past surface knowledge of God, and discover the amazing wealth of knowledge, insight, and extraordinary character of the Creator of all life and matter - then you have to dig.

Use His word as a plumb line - and within it you will find nuggets that He hides just beyond the easy reach to propel you to KEEP DIGGING!

Wooing us closer and closer, He waits for us to find more and more about Him. As you hold a diamond in the light it refracts and reflects in a glorious display of tones and hues. In fact, we humans are only able to see a narrow range of electromagnetic wavelengths or light - just imagine the brilliance of a rainbow up close - seeing colors meld into one another!

Speaking of unimaginable colors- this is a small glimpse from the book of Revelation (chapter 4) about the throne of God... John, one of Jesus' disciples describes his vision -

¹ After this I looked, and there before me was a door standing open in heaven. And the voice I had first heard speaking to me like a trumpet said, “Come up here, and I will show you what must take place after this.” ² At once I was in the Spirit, and there before me was a throne in heaven with someone sitting on it. ³ And the one who sat there had the appearance of jasper and ruby. A rainbow that shone like an emerald encircled the throne. ⁴ Surrounding the throne were twenty-four other thrones, and seated on them were twenty-four elders. They were dressed in white and had crowns of gold on their heads. ⁵ From the throne came flashes of lightning, rumblings and peals of thunder. In front of the throne, seven lamps were blazing. These are the seven spirits^[a]of God. ⁶ Also in front of the throne there was what looked like a sea of glass, clear as crystal. *

All I can say is it kind of makes me want to see the colors of heaven RIGHT NOW! : )

Have a GREAT week! and get your hands dirty! <3

Beginners and the need for grace

Hey! Welcome back! Thanks for your time! I am going to talk shop tonight :)

I went to an open mic jam in Granby last night...

It was a great jam, in fact! The house band slid sleekly from one jazz/blues standard to the next with barely a break in steam. The rhythm section was so hot I almost went home for oven mitts... lol... The head honcho is a really close friend of mine. This guy's chops are so good - never mind play behind his back, he can LOOK at the guitar's strings and they move - lol : P

I have learned a lot from him... Let's call him Barney.

Barney has played with everyone... He was down in Muscle Shoals, Nashville, and even recorded on a Percy Sledge album.. For those of you old enough to remember him... or albums, for that matter... :P

One thing he taught me was how to be a gracious player. He showed me by example. In essence, you can be the best player in the world, and if you are unkind to "the rookies", then you really aren't all that hot.

You know something? I have met some amazing players.. even played with some... No, I am not going to name drop... it's just obnoxious - *eyeroll*

Ironically, it seems the higher they are on the musical "food chain", in their cool confidence, they are more concerned with imparting to others than they are beefing up their egos. How strange.. It's almost like the equally perplexing relationship between pick-up truck tire size and height of the driver... : *

I was pretty cocky some years back. Big fish in a small pond syndrome... or rather "sin"drome... :) Annoying as all heck.

So, to get, rather grudgingly, to the POINT (lol) - it's this: I have had some rather humbling trips on "Grace Mountain". The first few times, I hurled headlong down... but slowly, I realized that (some of) those poor fumbling players learned from me...

The encouragement (which by the way means to give COURAGE) and the kind words from a pro, more than once, kept me from quitting.

It was pretty humbling to realize that I could have life IMPACT on the 'green ones.' :) and hopefully, someday, those newbies will take the fledglings under their wings... and teach them to fly :D

May your jams be soaring!

Stretched to the breaking point

Ok... I have had more mental ramblings lately. My fervent hope is that I can convey them in a way that somehow resembles sense ... : P

The question I am going to pose to you tonight is this:

Are you being stretched? Stretched so tight you can almost see your bones underneath? O_o

I have had SOME kind of stretching lately...

How much more can I get pulled apart at the seams before before I BREAK!!?!?!? At nearly six feet tall, I think I am "stretched" enough! lol

But seriously, I can relate. I have had all kinds of struggles as of late... I won't tell you all of them, but I have been dealing with all kinds of doubts, financial windfalls, bends toward depression and hopelessness... it's sometimes so hard to remember "This, too, shall pass" - the constant encouragement that this old world is not my long term home... that I have a bright future and hope :D

There have been times during the past few weeks where I have felt that I am so alone, and no one understands the pain and loss that I have dealt with these past few years.

I really could have a great pity party... In fact, I have, truth be told. Unfortunately, I was the only one that showed up for the party, and it wasn't all that fun.

So... in answer to the above question? How far can we be stretched before we break? What if I tell you that for me, that was the whole POINT?!

"What?? You are certifiable", you grimace skeptically...

Yes, I am... most certainly... :) BUT this "testing" is GOOD! : )

Did you know that when silver and gold are heated to excruciatingly high temperatures the impurities, or dross are/is removed? Removing them makes the precious metals more and more (pure) beautiful! As the dross is removed, you can see your reflection more and more clearly in them. It takes time to remove ALL of the junk! It can be a long process!

When you combine pressure with heat in coal, it produces a diamond. Likewise, when we let the trials shape rather than shatter our character, we sparkle!

I, for one, am endlessly captivated by the beauty and sparkle of diamonds. <3

For me, my trials and pains aren't wasted! I have a promise from my Father, (the Heavenly One) that every pain I go through will have a purpose... that somehow - someway He will produce something good! Even if it seems hopeless... He LOVES hopeless, cuz for Him, it's not!

Remember that when the kitchen gets too hot...

and have a "sparkling" week!

Thank you to the Open School of Gemology for the blog pic : )

Real LOVE

I am, for once, going to cut to the chase and try desperately hard not to rabbit trail. Though it seems like an insurmountable feat... I. Will. Be. Focused. : ) What I am going to toss out there may be a bit controversial, but truthfully, that doesn't always stop me... :p

I want to talk about Love. Real LOVE. Not the 'I "love"you today, but tomorrow you will bore me to tears' kind of "love". That ISN'T even love. Not the "I love you cuz you liked me first' love either. Again...not the real deal. Or my favorite... "Well... if it's convenient, I will "love" you'...We are so fickle aren't we? : *

We live in a disposable society. If something breaks, more often than not, it's more expensive to repair something than replace it.... and FORGET printers... You are almost better to but a new one than replace those ink cartridges... and marriage? It's taken a beating...sigh... we get bored and move on...or worse..give up. We just don't 'get it' sometimes...

Real love costs something. Sacrifice!? yes... time, money, effort. It requires compromise (the GOOD kind) when you usually DON'T want to... it's about not giving up or in...

Real love doesn't care what you have done, what you smell like, what your income is, or how you dress. Real love doesn't even care how well you play the bass... (though I might - haha!!)

Real LOVE came down here two thousand years ago, and still cares about you! So if you want to know the real love that is beyond any human understanding, and can forgive you of any sin that you have done, or maybe are even in the midst of - 'For God so LOVED the world, that whoever believes on Him will not perish, but have everlasting life! John 3:16... if you want to know more about this love, I'm here.. send me a line!

This week, if you are thinking about love, think about this... unlike people, He (Jesus: real LOVE) won't ever leave you - you are NEVER alone... <3

I hope you have an amazing LOVE filled week!

Of songs and writing

So... yes, another blog post. I know, I know... you haven't read the last one yet... perhaps you haven't read any... that's fine! I write them when I feel the unction to write. 'What's on your mind,' you ask, somewhat warily. : )

I want to talk to you about writing...song writing... I have been on a relatively new kick...

I have been playing the bass for almost THIRTY years! Good grief! I can sing backups, but lead??? sigh... and well, I haven't become the bass player extraordinnaire ... : ( .... but I have delved into songwriting... not so easy when your main instrument is not the typical accompanying kind...

EVERYONE seems to play guitar or keys... I just never wanted to... so, it's a bit limiting... in some ways it's like trying to write melody on the drums... : * sigh ... (now if I were Victor Wooten,or Jaco, or Stanley...well, I wouldn't be writing a modest blog and looking for work, now would I???) lol

Now, I have noooo recording and production prowess... and no software... and sadly... NO THEORY... Doesn't look too promising, does it?

BUT - I discovered the coolest thing! It's Chordbook, an online program that lets you see the chord on the guitar and hear the strum! So, I can find the corresponding chord to what I am "hearing", put a name to it, and save it for when I DO have someone to work with! It lets you save your chords and keep stuff for reference..

I actually wrote something on it, and recorded the thing on my Voice Memo app on my Iphone... crazy technology huh?

So, if I can actually find someone that wants to play with an old lady that can still rock a good funk groove, and thinks that "the church" really SHOULD play the blues, (cuz after all, King David wrote some kickin' blues material) then we'll talk... and have coffee... and jam : )

Keep looking up!

Lori

The Joys of Estrogen

Ok... this one may scare you guys - er, men off.... the title is certainly daunting... and I admit, at times I display the "spaghetti maze" of thinking that IS the female mind...We have been confounding men down through the ages... lol

Yet, I, sometimes, don't understand women... and I am one. I am a little off center, I suppose most creative types/musicians are - with that having been said... let me describe my typical experience when meeting a woman that is... shall we delicately say: 'past childhood rearing years'.

Scene: a typical women's church function - around the craft table -

I am surrounded by about ten middle aged 'ish' women. We are chatting cheerily away about typical "girlie" things - work, God,cooking, children, the men and issues in our lives. Suddenly out of nowhere, the woman next to me stares intently at me and blurts out - How OLD are you!?!? Me, I am somewhat uncomfortable with the subject. Old age has crept up quite sinisterly on me, and I am not at all used to being in the throes of mid life. sigh... Why does that question weigh so heavily on most women that they absolutely NEED to know how old you are?

My guess: the old 'Compare and Compete' syndrome? "Am I as pretty as she is? Am I prettier? How do I compare?" Why does everything have to turn into a competition? Does it really matter? (insert frustrated sigh here) The outer stuff fades anyways... beauty is nice to see, but if you have no inner beauty, then in my opinion, you really AREN'T beautiful...

(and if you really want to know what God thinks is beautiful go to www.biblegateway.com and quick/keyword search 'beautiful'. I think you will be mighty surprised!)

I have one more proverbial bone to pick with the female gender. You see guys, even WE, at times, get sooo vexed with --- DRAMA... I really only want to experience drama if I am sitting in a semi comfortable air-conditioned seat and someone paid for the ticket. : ) AND no one around me is talking on their cell phone or putting their feet on the back of my seat. Gum snapping is also discouraged. (Don't their parents teach kids any social courtesies these days?) sigh... that is for another rabbit trail, entirely.

Men can be sooo much easier to relate to. I envy ANYONE that can actually think about NOTHING! Really! I do... Let's face it, if I have 15,000 words per day and the man I am with has about 500, it can make for a crowded evening.. Ladies, it's so worth it to use up those many extra words on a woman that can actually pay attention without getting tired! lol

But seriously, though we speak two totally different languages in every conceivable way, when the two halves come together, it's pretty neat! What a design plan! Have a great weekend, all! <>< : )

No time to quit!

You came back! Thanks! Glutton for "pun"ishment, eh? This week's contemplative ramblings are simmering on the back burner- or at least trying. : )

My favorite Book - I call it Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.. (no, not an original name, but really cool, nonetheless!) has a lot to say about giving up. Quitting. Throwing in the towel. (WHERE exactly does that towel go, anyway??? ) just sayin' - :D

But even more amazingly - I am way more excited about what it says about NOT giving up... we 'super spiritual' types call it persevering. :P

There is a whole section that compares our lives to that of a runner in a race. As we 'run', we need to keep our eyes on the prize... the goal... the finish line. The reward.

For those of us that belong to Jesus Christ, He is our prize. He got us into this race, and He is the one that welcomes us at the end of it! :) kind of like Bill Cosby when he quips "Keep it up... I brought you into this world... I can take you OUT of it." lol... anyway.. of course I digress.. Seriously... He's such a Prize that we even hand Him back the winnings! : )

But even if you are not a Christian, think about it. Have you ever played a game of pool? When you are setting up your shot, you keep your eyes not on the cue ball, but at the ball you are trying to get into the pocket.

Keeping my eye on the finish line will do a number of things. It keeps me from getting distracted...and from looking around at the other racers, or those on the sidelines for that matter.. and Lord knows, I sure don't want to look in a mirror at that moment.. Frizz city with a nasty helping of smelly super soaked!

So... if you are tempted to quit...don't. Hang in there... Run hard! Run well! and win!

Too busy to breathe?

Hey all!!!

Welcome back to my life! There has been a theme winding it's way around my cerebral cortex for a while now... : ) and therefore, as you may have figured out, that generally morphs itself to a blog entry... : P

As I sit here and try to unravel the yarn that I have been spinning tirelessly (lol) lately, there are a few things that have struck me as a "Mayday". Maybe for you? Definitely for me!

Time seems to be such a precious commodity. With X amount of hours in the day, and XY and Z to get accomplished, how can we establish and maintain a somewhat stress free balance in our harried schedules?

I can tell you that I used to pride myself on my ability to multi task... I mean, doesn't EVERYONE take their tax info to the bubble bath??? lol... Granted it IS easier for women to multi task than men.. We inherit that : ) BUT, what we don't inherit, is frenzy.

As far as I can tell, we have choices. We can CHOOSE what we want to make a priority. Healthy boundaries and learning the word NO (heck - babies know THAT one!!!) can be a valuable tool for regaining sanity.

(Dr. Henry Cloud, Clinical Psychologist, wrote an insightful and needful book on boundaries in relationships, check it out!) I sometimes have to give myself permission to say no... that's a tough one for people pleasers. (still recovering, I am : )

Another point... I don't want to reach the end of my days with regrets. Especially with regards to (loving) people. : )

I find that if I leave my self open to be available, I can be used by the One that has some awesome things for me to do. For and WITH Him... : D ... and the last thought I have to leave you with is this...there is an awesome verse in my favorite Book that tells us that being in a state of rest or stasis, is where we need to be restored to.

"Take My yoke upon you. Let Me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls." Doesn't THAT say it best?

Have a great week - and slow down a little.. it'll be good for you and those you love! <3>

Let it snow

Hey all!!! It's snowing. Not a big surprise, it IS New England. It IS winter. (I started the countdown to spring yesterday - 70 days left til spring officially starts.) As to "weather" or not we see warmth and green, God Himself only knows :)

Ok, after the per functional weather comments, I would like to take it a level deeper. Get the shovel ready... : P

I made up my mind that I wasn't going to spend the entire winter griping about how I would rather be in South Carolina, (they, strangely, are digging themselves out of a heap o snow), nor do I want to get into endless convos about when the winter might relent or how many storms are we going to have this year... I really don't want to dwell on the inconvenience of winter, that's obvious. It certainly won't change anything but your blood pressure.. : (

There ARE beautiful things about winter. I am determined to keep them in my sight.. Let's see.. No FLIES can survive this weather, and since I abhor the dread beasts, this is an obvious giant plus!

The silence of snow is enthralling. Ever walked in the falling snow with no cars plodding and shoving along? When the only sound you could hear was the faint rustle of the wind through branches and the crunch under your feet?

I can almost see the hibernating animals underneath their soft white blanket, dreaming of dinner, nestled warmly.

Winter houses Christmas : ) ... you also don't have to deal with the triple Hs...Hazy/hot/humid... *insert angelic choir, here*

Hot cocoa, eggnog ANYTHING!, fireplaces, good times with loved ones, games and movies, lending a hand (with a shovel in it) to a neighbor in need...

So, what is YOUR favorite part of winter? I'd love to know!

Thanks to www.snowcrystals.com for the gorgeous pic!

Confessions of a Control Freak

Ok... so maybe I have control issues... so the toilet paper has to hang over the top of the roll... and it just "makes sense" to have all my pieces of clothing face the same way in the closet... and again, it's uncomfortable to hold hands with someone backwards...

It has been brought to my attention lately, ... that I have some "problems" with control. That's my take. Yessir! Just tendencies. right??... : P

What seems to bring out the worst of my clutching grip over my circumstances is when plans change. I hate change. In fact, the only change I DO like is in my coin jar. Or wallet. Watch the traffic back up like a clogged septic tank, and you can watch me go from (ok, here's where I date myself) deep blue on the mood ring to onyx black. Planning cascades out the window - a dissolving pipe-dream. Or watch me squirm like a toddler in a highchair when "Fearless Leader" changes a set list... yeah... sigh.. it's bad...

Letting go? Hmmm... I would rather ride a camel in New York city traffic in mid August. Smells and all... I'd also rather face a blind date... or even buy a bathing suit! ok... I would rather HAVE MY PICTURE TAKEN!!! (watch out for the lightening bolt on THAT one!) : P

So where are you going with all this rambling, you ask?? (wearily, I might add) : D

Just to point out the trust and control are linked. I know in Whom I trust. Not that it's been easy. It's been a process. I am in process. A kicking and screaming process, but in a process, nonetheless...

The One who made me can certainly keep me. He has hundreds of promises to that effect. Little by little, my fingers become unpried from holding on to my life with death talons. You might not see grass grow day to day, but it DOES grow... and with a smile and upraised open hand, and I get closer to Home!

An end of an era!

Greetings! It's Thursday night, and I can't sleep, soooo here I am, bothering YOU! lol

What's on your mind, you ask? Well, funny you should ask. I am thinking about seasons- and change. This past week, a group that I have attended for the past eight weeks drew to a close.

What awesome times they were! We had the best hosts! They fed us, loved us, learned with us, and fed us... : ) seeing a pattern??? lol

Al D., or "Doc Bean", is pictured here meticulously prepping up vanilla bean seeds for his famous, or rather ALMOST famous Al Bucks coffee.. it's going to catch on... I know it! <3>

Having met and gotten close to some cool new friends, and much as I am saddened to think that I won't be spending Monday nights with them any more - I know that there will be another adventure waiting for me around the corner. Just as awesome as this one has been...

It's autumn - fall.. winter is right around the corner. The next season is looming close by. (entirely TOO close in my almost humble opinion.. : )

Granted, change doesn't come all that easy for me. I have to really work at my attitude regarding changes in my life.

So... my options: I can moan, groan, complain and caterwaul that I have to move on, OR I can anticipate more fun and more adventure... but it is going to have to be some really cool stuff to outdo the times with "Doc" and his most wonderful wife, Heather! <3

So, while change isn't exactly easy, it IS after all New England... and if you don't like the weather, then just wait a minute!